The Reviews!

Here's what people thought about Talking in the Dark when it first came out in 2003.

from Booklist, December 1, 2003

"Merrell has packed a lot of memories into his 22 years: his parents' divorce and remarriages ('I was seven, and remember you loving each other, then not'); realization of his homosexuality ('You sort of know. In that vague way you know you want to write or paint'); and his own failed and new relationships.

"He has also packed a lot of wisdom into his life -- wisdom about life, death, self-acceptance, and the vagaries of love and lust. Likewise, he has garnered a wealth of writing craft, and his free-verse memoir is rich with metaphor, words carefully chosen to say enough but not too much. In one beautiful poem, for example, he alludes to death as that first terrifying jump off the diving board: 'Is that what Heaven is like -- four seconds and a splash?'

"Talking in the Dark captures twenty-two sad, lonely, yet hopeful years in a life readers will hope will be a long and productive one."

Frances Bradburn

from School Library Journal, January 2004

"An affecting memoir told in verse, this work launches a promising young poet. It is more than the recollection of faltering family life; it also deals with Merrell's acceptance of his homosexuality. It is about sons and brothers, friends and lovers.

"The individual poems enhance one another yet stand alone. The language is measured, doled out carefully, artfully. He writes about his mother: "She's known, she'll say, since I was five/ and I'll want to ask why/ she didn't tell me sooner, but instead ask/ if she's okay." Memories of when he and his father almost speak of his closet homosexuality, and when the moment passes are related in poignant phrases. The poems reveal the author's journey through childhood through the worrisome pit of teen sexuality, made all the more harrowing when a lover dies of AIDS.

"He silently carries around his fear for ages. He writes, "Admitting/ the danger is a danger in itself." This memoir is as difficult as it is beautiful. Merrell writes, "Years later I'll wonder how I didn't know I was lonely when everyone around me did." His sophisticated verse and compelling story will capture attention as it stirs compassion."

Alison Follos, North Country School, Lake Placid, NY

from VOYA (Voice of Youth Advocates), April 2004

"In counterpoint to Eireann Corrigan's You Remind Me of You, Merrell lays open the journal of his life, taking readers with him through his parents' divorce, his awakening sexuality, and his quest to find love and acceptance while discovering himself in the process. Merrell's poetry is conversational and questioning, frequently arranged into unrhymed couplets, breaking lines almost randomly on the page. Each poem is a snapshot in Merrell's adolescent slideshow, the same figures sometimes reappearing often throughout the text. Readers are compelled to follow Merrell's hesitating steps to uncover the secret he has kept from himself: his homosexuality. Once it is revealed, Merrell shares with readers the first time he kisses a boy; the ache of unrequited, secret love; and the reality of HIV as it claims his friend Ben and forces him to face his own mortality.

"The poetry in this collection spans a number of years, and the pieces are divided into five sections from the past to the present. Merrell addresses sexuality with a childlike delicacy, choosing to focus on its intimacy and emotion. Reflective in nature, the poems in this memoir will appeal to older teens, gay or straight, who have struggled to understand themselves and how they fit into the complexity of human relationships."